All
my life I've been hearing about people having pet peeves. I finally asked one
guy what kind of critter it is and he yelled "That's one of 'em!"
Some people. I've had dogs, cats, birds, fish, an occasional reptile and once a
pet rock back in the 70s, but I've never seen a pet peeve. I don't know where
they come from, how big they are, what they eat, or if they're potty trained.
Are they good home security, or do they just lay around all the time licking
themselves?
Well,
I thought the internet would give me a straight answer, but it just muddied the
water. It seems whatever a pet peeve is, people don't like them very much. In
that case, why have one to start with? The dictionary says a pet peeve is
irritating and annoying, and then goes on to compare it to random things that
frankly have nothing to do with having a pet. For instance, there's this
website called GetAnnoyed.com that has
a list as long as your arm of things that are suppose to remind people how bad
a pet peeve is. Makes me want to vow to never have one, that's for sure, but it
also makes me more determined to find a picture of it so I can avoid it. For
instance, a pet peeve is like a driver who doesn't use their turn signal. Those
kind of folks don't bother me in the least, because I don't know where I'm
going half the time anyway. Another pet peeve reminded a fellow of someone
talking out loud while they're writing a letter or email. Heck, I kind of enjoy
hearing what other people have to say. Some other guy compares a pet peeve to
kids who tease dogs through the fence. I suppose you should leave your pet
peeve inside if you want peace with the neighbors.
Pet
peeves must be pretty wicked, what with so many people upset with them. I knew
a man once that owned a pet rattlesnake. He always tried to get the rattler to
share its space with mice, but that never worked out. If I ever break down and
get me a pet peeve I believe I'd keep it locked in the bedroom when company
drops by. There's this other website that even has a top ten list of
comparisons to pet peeves, called (of course, der) thetoptens.com/pet-peeves.com.
Their number one problem with pet peeves is like someone chewing and talking
with their mouth open. I have to admit, that can get fairly messy when you're slurping
soup, but if you have, say, a dog around while you're smacking away at your
dinner, he won't mind in the least if some vittles drop out of your mouth. As a
matter of fact, some dogs have no problem eating food you've already chewed up,
especially if you open your mouth wide enough. Pet peeves must not be very
clean animals, because the number three reason why they're disliked is because it's
like not washing your hands after going to the toilet. What kind of sick
pervert goes around watching other people in the toilet? If you don't like your
pet peeve's hygiene, bathe it from time to time for goodness sake!
I
think pet peeve owners should really try to get a life. One woman's pet peeve
annoyed her so much she said it was like having a road map that wasn't folded
properly. I'm starting to wonder if pet peeves are getting a bum rap. Another
guy compared his pet peeve to people who don't use coasters. For cryin' out
loud, mister! Use a napkin! Just the other day a lady at Wal-Mart complained
that her pet peeve left the toilet seat up. How rude! How do you think the pet
peeve feels having to close the toilet seat all the time? It's just an animal,
remember?
I
think I'll get me one of those pet peeves if I can just find one. Nobody I talk
to wants to part with theirs, even though all they want to do it bitch about
it. Once I have one for my very own, I'll let it leave the toilet seat up, and
it won't even have to wash afterwards.
No comments:
Post a Comment